A New Year Dawning

As I reflect on this year I think of many awesome and awful things almost simultaneously. It is a great thing that a blend of events occurred in order to prevent complete collapse due to stress or complacency for the lack of it. It is an interesting thing, the life cycle. It seems true that it sails by at light speed. But oh what a great ride.
In another day the pace was slower, the entertainment was socializing and the culture was family or home based. People rarely moved around the globe or spent their days and nights away from loved ones. Now you are challenged to find them in the same state let alone the same house!
Pace, it is all about the pace. We are always in a hurry and thus the time must keep our pace. It flies by often before you can develop your photos or hang last years high school picture up. You are shipping your Christmas parcels overnight express mail despite the fact that you knew Christmas was coming 365 days ago! In the last century you spent half of the year just MAKING the gifts, and then had to plan for 3 weeks for the horse or carriage delivery.
As I look at this picture of my family from the early 1800's I think how long did they spend getting cleaned up, traveling and posing for the photo. Hours? Days? Today we want that WalMart discount shot and we want it right now! Our last family shoot took about 15 minutes max. And there were complaints of being hot, crowded, uncomfortable. Really, are you looking at those clothes? There was no air conditioning, there was no indoor plumbing, there as no cold refreshment stand. Hmmm
So what would it take for you to relax, reorganize, maybe re-prioritize your time. In our fast paced society I am suddenly in favor of planners that allow you to block out or plan time for whatever. Photos, zoo, shopping, coffee, meals, trips, whatever!
So in this New Year it might be a good opportunity, or your last opportunity to spend some quality time with those that really mean the most. Don't waste a minute. Don't let the year zoom by without a single change. Plan now and enjoy this New Year dawning.

A Split Second

This past 10 days has been one of rejoicing and remembering. I have watched friends and family celebrate the joy of restored life that was once on the brink of death, and a family preparing for the passing of a life most loved. We are constantly reminded that we are not in control. It is the circle of life for all mankind. And these circumstances should drive us to the only one who is in complete control. But do they always?

In the trenches it is hard to find an atheist, or so they say. And when we are unprepared for life altering events, we often cry out to "God" even if we have never done that before or we are not sure who or what He is. But once the fear and urgency subside, so do the calls for an answer. A child should never suffer or die early, and we are always challenged to accept and understand those situations. When the child recovers despite the predictions of the physicians we often attribute that to people, but the truth is only God has that authority and power.

When our loved ones are faced with death, that is when we plead for reassurance or realize we are unprepared for what comes next. We perhaps have lived in a way that is apathetic or careless, not thinking about the end but only the moment. It causes great anxiety when the time arrives especially if we do not know for sure what the outcome will be. We may even become angry or utterly depressed. We have not paid attention to the message all of our life and now can not recall it. Yet it is the same today as when we first heard it.

The Christmas story really is the complete answer, as we see God becoming man for the soul purpose of dying so that anyone can live! Wow. In a split second we can choose to accept the offer of eternal life, a split second! That is how long it took a car to rear-end and total my van in June. That is how long it took a stroke to threaten the life of an eleven year old. That is how long it took for the last breath to leave a dear friend. Do you feel that in a split second you will have time to "think" about this offer? No, not really.

So my challenge today, take a second and make a decision that will give you eternal peace. No more fears about the unknown. No more anxiety or anger about the circle of life. A split second for all of eternity. Wow.

John 3:17

Until Death

I have a bath towel that has a great quote: "It may be true that married men live longer but they are much more willing to die." I love it and I am sure it is true. Ha. My husband has always been patient and very forgiving. But I have placed even greater challenge on him this year as my memory has been a bit ...... um.....absent at times since a summer car accident. Leave it to the unexpected events in life to change a course. We wake up and feel we know what the day will hold and Boom, surprise, you are completely wrong!

Doesn't mean the change is bad, but it can certainly force you to evaluate many things when these life events occur. What is important? What really needs to be done? What can be let go of, etc? Will world peace be prevented? Will Oprah cancel your featured episode? Really....

I have historically been very busy and very organized. Now not so much, matter of fact it is midnight, I have dirty dishes in the sink and a load of clothes that will need to meet the dryer in the morning. And I need to vacuum but that will need to wait too. Will anyone die if these things aren't done? No way. I spent the evening watching football with my husband and painting with my son. Then i tackled a poster for a friend. These are the things that will have value for the family and friends, not that my baseboards were washed (though I would be really grateful if anyone would want to help with any of these things:)).

I look at couples who have been married for many years and when asked what kept them together it was never once mentioned that it was because the dishes were in the cupboard or the laundry was done or the windows were washed. It was more for things like friendship, support, faithfulness, forgiveness, humor, patience and of course love. Those are things I want in my husbands citation should he be asked. And we are friends, which is great because when the world rises up against us or the lawn overtakes the house, we still have each other.

Proverbs 17

Parents

Parents! You got to love them even when they drive you crazy. And they will...but then again I think we probably gave them a run for their money, right? It is always fun to see parents and their children no matter how old they are. I notice grown people when in the presence of their parents regressing to that attention seeking behavior that got them the pinched cheek or that special twinkle of an eye or a raised eyebrow!

When we consider the sands of time, it really works out about even, the amount of time we spend in each role. We are children for about 18-20 years, 35 if you are a man! And then you are an adult; wise, competent, able to sustain life without the need for parental guidance. Then you pass the crest of the mid-life roller coaster and the slow trickle begins eventually careening into geriatrics which is essentially the return to childhood. Many spending as much time on this end as at the beginning. So they get to parent us for a time then we often get to return the favor. Good stuff.

I have always said I may have to grow old but I will not grow up. I am avoiding that entire middle road where you have to be sensible and responsible....well not completely avoiding it, but I will have lots of immature fun along the way. That way when the time comes for me to return to the childish ways of my youth it will not be such a drastic change for those who will be changing my diapers. I will have always blown bubbles, giggled too loud and had a food fight each week just to keep in shape! They will expect no different as they have never seen me grow serious along the journey. A very different path from the parents of old.

So as I pass through my "parent" years it does not mean that there are not serious things going to happen, but I will find the positive or good in them. I will Give Thanks! Doesn't mean thanks for this horrible thing but thanks for taking care of me through it. I can do that, I can be grateful in all things. If I am grateful I can also find joy in the journey.

Since the Dawn of Gifts

As soon as the holidays begin you see children and adults alike regress and it dawned on me that likely it has been in the family "chain" since creation. Whenever a special occasion is approaching, one where gift giving may be a part, the attitudes and behaviors change like an unmedicated schizophrenic. Suddenly the chants of Christmas lists and a review of the years personal performances are heard as everyone pleads their case for that new whatever it is.
I bet when Adam and Eve found new leaves or a different fur to wear the kids started bargaining to get one right away. And when chariots went from single passenger to four seaters I am sure that "dad" thought this would really impress the neighbors and make his commute to the stadium so much better. We all know that when the electric dishwasher was developed every woman in the world could rationalize the need for one with the unlikely support of every family member as this would be a win-win gift. But do we really need the newest, latest and greatest model? Is it not just a box that is going to do the same thing, wash your dishes?
What is it that makes us "want" stuff? Are we really so deprived or needy that we have to always have new things? I think often of those without anything. How can I be so self absorbed to want when there are those without a pillow or roof. Not that it is bad to give or receive, but with true vision or perspective I wonder if we would change our list even a little. Perhaps get less and give much more....
I recently have had many friends endure serious hardships and life altering events. For Christmas one of these families would like to see their 11 year old son be able to regain his physical abilities after he suffered a massive stroke. Another would like to be able to have complete success from the chemo therapy for her cervical cancer and yet another would be grateful for a peaceful last Christmas with their father. There are countless families and individuals that are trapped in homelessness and poverty wanting only for a warm meal or coat. What is it I would really like for Christmas? What is it I really need? When I consider my great fortune I am hard pressed to find anything I really need for Christmas.

What we can do for the needs of those around us is really easy and simple. Pray is the first and most important gift. We don't even have to leave our beds to do that. Communicate our love perhaps with a card or some baked goods or a hug. Share from your abundance. That pair of socks or shoes you have in a box in the closet would be a start, or that blanket you never use or the canned goods you bought on sale and have yet to include in a meal. So while the season of giving is upon us, we might focus more on the real gifts, the ones that bring so much more than momentary joy, but those that impact a life on a more eternal level. Those might be the best Christmas gifts ever!

Deuteronomy 15:11, 1 Samuel 2:8, Matthew 25:35

I Believe

This time of year causes us all to regress a bit I think. We are having more fun, we are more cheery and perhaps exhibit a slightly greater than usually courtesy. We know we are going to get something new and shiny, we know this because we were really good! Right? But I also see some tantrums, impatience and harsh words. I think of the children's holiday movies from my youth such as Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer or Frosty the Snowman. These ADULT behaviors are seen in those simple movies. The mean reindeer's that won't accept Rudolph and let him be part of their hood, or the cranky magician who keeps trying to steal back the magic hat, not so much for what it does but because he doesn't want anyone else to have it! Sound like any of the people you have met in the stores this week? Many of the "naughty" grown ups are having a hard time sharing with others.
What I believe often causes such unattractive behavior is that we choose to celebrate or not celebrate this day only once a year. There is so much pressure and so many high hopes for the day, that one single day, that the slightest deviation from the "plan" has people all in a dither. I imagine that is what set the reindeer off. Why did the "special" reindeer get to lead, what made him so high and mighty, this is not how it has ALWAYS been done, how can Santa do this??
So how do we protect our holiday spirit and perhaps help others to learn to be nice. The reindeer eventually gave the new deer order a try and they were able to save Christmas! What would it be like if those irritable grown ups spent just a second before stealing the last parking spot or grabbing the shopping cart you were getting ready to put your little bundle of joy in. What if they looked into the eyes of those around them and suddenly had "human" contact. Hmmmm Even the Grinch's heart grew once he saw that Whoville would still love him even if he was different.
Perhaps we can start a trend. Offer that parking space to the other car, hand off a basket for their shopping, use nice words and be patient. This is the one time in my life that I think world wide use of iPods would be wonderful as very few people are hostile when they are singing. Christmas carols are great to remind us of the joy we are supposed to be building.
I believe we can all have a wonderful holiday, we just might have to help a few find their way. I believe we can all get along even if we are of two totally different backgrounds. I believe we can celebrate all year long and when the actual holiday arrives we will have perfected our "nice" behavior and will truly spread joy to the world. I believe!

Send a Little Love

In the good old days families stayed within a matter of miles, often for their entire lives. They may feud from time to time, but most of the time the cookies are baked and the family reunites. Now families are spread across the continent or the globe for that matter. I love my family. Sure that is what many people may say, but the question is, do they really? Do they recall the days when they clung together during thunderstorms or stayed up late once a year on News Year to eat snacks and watch television? Do they remember the tough times they have shared, tears and all, or the very silly times that still bring back giggles?

I have a very global family with people all over. We enjoy staying in touch mostly via cell phones and the internet. Sometimes you can almost hear the longing in their words or voice that says they would love to be in the same house with card playing and cheese platters scattered around the table, especially at the holidays. Our family spent a lot of time together and would even drive hours in a blizzard up hills both ways to see a basketball game, a play or graduation. I have only missed one and I am still sad about that. Now you can even web cam things. Who knew! But one thing will always be missing, the hug.

So how do you replace that shared embrace, and all the emotion that goes with it? Maybe it is in gentle or loving words, maybe it is sharing a memory or photo. Are we really committed to sticking by our families and being there no matter where or what is going on? Do we say thank you for being there or for the things they have done? Do we let them know we really LOVE them? Now is an excellent time to step out, send a hug or if you can, drive there to give it. You never know what that moment in time may mean now or down the road to your family. After all, we really don't know the number of our days.

1 Peter 3

A Land Apart

Have you ever had a day where you wish you could put a continent between you and what ever you are facing? I always think of the sound of the ocean and the birds and the calming waves that would bring you rest during the migration to the promised land. That is the land without humans, communication, work, crisis, illness. I am going there one day and I can tell you that many times I think it should be within the next blink, but alas, I open my eyes to see I am still here, waiting.

The bad news is that waiting can be difficult. You have to constantly work at or work out all of the events that bring the pain, sorrow, frustration, scars and mental anguish. They can leave you weary, sad, angry, rejected and in mourning. The good news is that in the balance of time we have the events that bring pure joy: marriage, children, love, support and acceptance. And we have the promise that no matter who wounds us, no matter how deep our despair, no matter who rejects is we are always loved and accepted by the One who is greater still. Isn't that great to ponder?

I have seen the pendulum swing as I have ventured out this week during the season of "joy"? I can tell you at the post office, in the store or in the mail events have not been complete joy, but a smattering of toxic fumes that can deflate any good mood. Thank God we have a place to dump the waste and be cleansed of the debris. Thank God we have a place to be refreshed and restored. Thank God for Christmas that perfect gift in which we can rest assured. Thank God that by accepting His gift we can be sure that we will get to that land apart, with rivers flowing, of endless joy.

Revelation 22

1/2 Off Christmas

I have had one of those holiday prequels which has led me to believe that laughter is going to be essential to enjoy this most special holiday season. I have taken every caution as I put out the decorations to this point to make sure things like the lights all come on, the hooks are all in place, the candles are all in good condition. But what is that you say, if I have taken all these pre-decorating steps how is it possible to have a problem? Let me "splain!"

So first, I drug out the indoor Christmas tree. This meant pulling it from it's box, putting it together and then painstakingly "fluffing" the branches. My first clue was when the branches began coming off in my hands. Then I carefully wound the string of pretested lights around the tree. Then my son and I hung the ornaments with care. So far so good. We plug it in and "Viola" It is good. Until my sons gaze slowly reaches the top of the tree where he declares "there is no star. Where is the star? We must have a star!" Okay star on the list. So we move on.

Then I pull out the outdoor lights. You know the ones; long, tangled despite the twist ties, icicles all kinked up. I test the strands and when it appears we are good to go I sit and untangle the cords and straighten every little icicle. Really, who makes these things? My dear husband comes out to help put them up and we plug them in and it is good. So I get the outdoor tree out and put together. I then test those lights and indeed we are going for gold. I take the final steps to link them all together with the extension cords neatly hidden and I am done. Until my son sees the tree and his gaze goes slowly to the top where he declares "there is no star. Where is the star? We must have a star!" You are not going crazy, you have read this conversation already. See how my world works? I just apparently am plagued with a starless Christmas. So it is added to the list and we move on.

A short time after darkness falls, we light the tree and switch on the lights. It is good.......or is it? You see, I either have the slowest blinker in the world or the top section of the indoor lights (a single strand) are shorting out for long periods of time. But the star we purchased stays nicely lit at the top highlighting the dark gap in the middle. We decide to let it go. When it blinks on once every hour or two it is beautiful. Then we step out to admire the outdoor lights where we discover by day 2 that the end segment of the icicle lights has gone out (a portion of the long single strand)and as I chuckle about this I turn to see the BOTTOM half of the outdoor tree lights out (another long single strand!) But the star we purchased stays nicely lit at the top highlighting the darkness at the bottom...actually looks rather like a table tree floating in the air at night!

So I have decided a few things: The halves that are lit are beautiful! and if we put all the pieces together they make a single solid tree with overhead icicles lights. I have also decided that while thankfully Christmas lives year round, my lights and trees are condemned to die post this season of joy which will bring me great joy indeed! And I also came to be grateful as I realized the fact that some people have no decorations and limbless trees just like in the Peanuts Christmas movie A Charlie Brown Christmas. So it is a matter of making lemonade out of lemons or in this case realizing I can celebrate Christs birth with my humble tree and lights. It is all good!

Winkin and Blinkin and Are you Kidding Me?

"Well we have the lights on but they are doing the same thing as they did last year, so we unplugged them. They keep coming on and off. They aren't working right so we will just leave them off." Okay, so this is the conversation just yesterday. And it is the conversation that led to some poor neighbors adult son spending considerable time last year to "search through and fix" the lights. Is anyone thinking about that blinking phenomenon? So I am wondering about the last century and it's impact on the near centurions who are trying to adapt to the modern age.

I suppose in the good old days if you saw a flicker it meant your candle was out, or there was a breeze in the out house. And as advances were made it meant that you were standing at the switch flipping it up and down. So when did these blinking lights come into being and why is it causing so much stress for the old people? They have been challenged to keep up with much of modern day technology, but blinking lights? Hmmmm

In 1895 the first "electrically lit" tree was put on display at the white house. 1916the tungsten filament lights were first used for the Christmas tree. The 1940's saw bulb factories converted for wartime production and the Christmas lights were not manufactured. But it was in 1955 that the twinkling lamp or blinking bulbs were first used. 1955! So I am seeing a 50 year learning curve....Can that be right?

I have often thought I could be hard headed or stubborn or slow to change or learn new concepts, but 50 years? I am thinking it may be more than just something they are not familiar with. And then I think of exposure. If you never expose yourself to new things you can not learn them. And now as I recall my childhood I do not remember any deviation from the very traditional, standard decorations and activities. We never had a computer, digital camera, cable. I was blinded my entire life by a movie camera that was used with dinosaurs. As a matter of fact, now that I think about it, we rather resembled the Brady's at times. Hmmm

So what can I learn from this little reflection you wonder? Well, first of all, don't force the old people to change. Make sure their lights don't blink and definitely do not add any electronic devises to the house. Secondly, challenge yourself daily so that you can keep up with change and have options for your Christmas lights from year to year. Thirdly be tolerant of the needs of others and the things they cling to as some day I am sure when the flying ship pulls up to my drive I will still want to fire up the Bronco and DRIVE to the store. Just think about what can change in the next 50 years.

Integrity

Integrity is a very difficult thing to master for man kind. It is not what we do in public that will give evidence but the things unseen that will be most telling. What we do when no one is looking, or at least no one that knows us is looking. That is really the measure of a man or woman. We are constantly faced with choices, and any of us could choose unwisely. Truth be told, we all have at some time or another. If we are really honest, we can not throw the first stone, at anyone.

What makes it difficult is our expectations of those who present a set of values or a lifestyle to the public, but secretly are living an entirely different life. My father was the same in public as in private. Constant, dependable, honest. If you met him at the airport (where else would he be) then you knew him completely.

I think today of the lives of those who are unfaithful to their families in some way or other. When they are found out, all are shocked and can not believe the man or woman they thought they knew was this bad person. How could they fall? How could they make these bad decisions? How could they lie to us all?

Good questions, all. But even more daunting is who will be next? Many make small missteps while some fall deep into a life of dishonesty or deceit. We will all do one or the other, or both during our lifetime no matter how diligently we try not to. Paul shared he found himself doing that which he did not want to do, and reminded us we all fall short.

So what does this mean, that we can not trust anyone or that we are all losers? In one way the answer is yes! We are all losers, have all fallen and are all messed up. Our personal disasters may affect just us but more likely is that the fall out from our actions will always affect those around you. But it does not mean we all must fail or have no way out. And it certainly does mean that we need to continue in our poor choices. There is a way, even once mistakes are made. It just takes a change in direction.

Romans 3:23, Romans

War

When we look at that word it evokes a plethora of images. Some people think about a war of words, or a personal war. But today we are constantly reminded of global wars and rumors of war. The kind that call us to sacrifice the safety and presence of our family members and friends. The kind that requires our family members and friends to be courageous in the face of danger. The kind that cause us to evaluate even our own mortality.

I come from a military family so this is very familiar to me. It does not make it any easier. It is hard to have family away anytime but during the holidays especially that unoccupied seat is most noticeable. I have spent years without my father home, realizing only now as an adult the danger he was in at times. Today I have nephews and great friends who are deployed in three different countries. It is incredibly difficult for me to consider their risk. I tear up whenever I consider it.

I can not imagine how this time is for their families. But I do know that what these fine men and women provide for me, my family and our country is the protection of freedom. They lay it all on the line so I can blog, watch the television show of my choice, vote for the politician who best represents me and worship in the house of my faith. The price for this is immeasurable.

So to those who serve, THANK YOU. I am grateful for you everyday and pray constantly for your safety and wisdom in the field. For those of you who are missing your family I THANK YOU and pray for you as well, to be strong, trusting constantly in the One who has known us before time and who holds us in His hands.

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Isaiah 41:10