Maybe not.....
"Mom I can't wait until next year to go back to Kellis with my friends. They miss me!" And he misses them desperately at times. I see or hear more since the Friendship walk. He misses his brothers and prom date. He thinks if he would visit Kellis they would all be there.
How do you help him understand he will never go back to high school?
How can I help him understand they are graduating and moving on too?
As an only child we have always kept him plugged into groups or activities where he would build friendships. And he has, a zillion acquaintances and several great friends. But his heart aches a bit for that gang of friends he saw five days a week. My heart hurts for him as I try to sound excited about growing up, moving on, keeping in touch at social gatherings. Then it dawns on me, that this is that unfortunate course of life that has left me with the same longing at different stages of my life. I didn't like it either sometimes mourning the loss for some time.
It was my last post, where I felt the 'ouch' in change. I thought he had escaped unscathed but perhaps not. I have seen social circles change in my life as I changed schools, churches, entered relationships, got married, gained new neighbors, added more members to our groups. You become less relevant, moved down the preference list, don't fit the feel or look of the group. I have weathered this time and again as part of life, perhaps Gods way of moving me in a new direction. But it can and has carried a price.
So here is my amazing, charismatic, joyful, loving, happy man feeling alone and a bit lost without his friends. We have activities coming up again, but what do I do for the here and now? He had my iPad today and wrote notes. One wrote back, dependable and true. He stared at the iPad for some time. So I put it away. We are going to check tomorrow.
Thing is, even if we have our get togethers or they write back, how do I help him move on? Or do I let him grieve awhile? My protective mothers heart wants to prevent his suffering but I know it is also a part of life. It is the part I dislike. I have worked diligently for 18 years to keep him protected, surrounded by good people, happy! And he is warming up to his new environment but he has not found that friend, that one that is your pal you bum around with.
Oh I pray he finds that friend or two that will make him feel excited, happy, connected.
In the meantime I hope God will move mountains to unite The Brothers and The Prom Date just long enough to fill his sad heart with contentment and peace.
How do you help him understand he will never go back to high school?
How can I help him understand they are graduating and moving on too?
As an only child we have always kept him plugged into groups or activities where he would build friendships. And he has, a zillion acquaintances and several great friends. But his heart aches a bit for that gang of friends he saw five days a week. My heart hurts for him as I try to sound excited about growing up, moving on, keeping in touch at social gatherings. Then it dawns on me, that this is that unfortunate course of life that has left me with the same longing at different stages of my life. I didn't like it either sometimes mourning the loss for some time.
It was my last post, where I felt the 'ouch' in change. I thought he had escaped unscathed but perhaps not. I have seen social circles change in my life as I changed schools, churches, entered relationships, got married, gained new neighbors, added more members to our groups. You become less relevant, moved down the preference list, don't fit the feel or look of the group. I have weathered this time and again as part of life, perhaps Gods way of moving me in a new direction. But it can and has carried a price.
So here is my amazing, charismatic, joyful, loving, happy man feeling alone and a bit lost without his friends. We have activities coming up again, but what do I do for the here and now? He had my iPad today and wrote notes. One wrote back, dependable and true. He stared at the iPad for some time. So I put it away. We are going to check tomorrow.
Thing is, even if we have our get togethers or they write back, how do I help him move on? Or do I let him grieve awhile? My protective mothers heart wants to prevent his suffering but I know it is also a part of life. It is the part I dislike. I have worked diligently for 18 years to keep him protected, surrounded by good people, happy! And he is warming up to his new environment but he has not found that friend, that one that is your pal you bum around with.
Oh I pray he finds that friend or two that will make him feel excited, happy, connected.
In the meantime I hope God will move mountains to unite The Brothers and The Prom Date just long enough to fill his sad heart with contentment and peace.
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