Part II: Like Sands Thru the Hourglass..........

Well,

You have survived Part I and dared to see what is next, so here now is 'the rest of the story' to quote my favorite man in the world......DAD! Master Gates came running out of the tunnel after graduation, "I did it. I did it." Yes he did. He hugged, smiled, hugged some more, talked very loudly, full of excitement. The energy was palpable. Certainly every senior there was floating at least 3 feet off the ground. Wonderful!!



Then his dad said the magic words...."We should go home to your PARTY!" Thought he was going to run home. Dad managed to keep up with him, and transport him IN the truck safely home to a house full of guests. You see, I have some of the best friends in the world. MANY MANY friends. Caroline and Kim had prepared the house. Diana took grandma back to her care facility. Tonya, Carolyn and Rebecca were armed with cameras. Charlotte brought fruit and cupcakes. Grandma and Grandpa Art were right in the middle of the party. Friends who have walked 'the walk' with us came along with their children and grown ups. It was AWESOME! I am certain that I did not get to speak to everyone. I hugged them all a million times in my heart though!!! If you had a warm feeling, and you weren't wet, that was me sending a hug!

Now, there is a prologue to this story that is key to the entire event which just adds more fun. You see, Cody planned his graduation party about October. All he wanted was an 'indoor outdoor party' at his house so kids could play in the back and then in his room. you see, we rarely have company. We are working on changing that lately. Anyway, the yard has been waiting it's rejuvenation for some time and it was in April that Rich inquired as to the plan for graduation. I reminded him that the plan is the backyard! So getting the green light we hired the most wonderful landscapers to finish the yard. And they did, the DAY BEFORE! I knew they would get it done. They knew what or WHO we were working for. It was great.

AND my dear friends Caroline (who flew in from CALIFORNIA) and Kim spent two days helping me get it all together. Incredible. They made it fun, easier and exciting! Besides which there was a lot of girl chat and french food. YES our favorite place Le Chalet was a part of the celebration. Now fast forward back to the boy who had not seen the yard nor the decorations arriving at home to gates open wide and people! LOTS OF PEOPLE! Bubbles in the air (the grown ups seemed to enjoy these the most), balloons and snappy sunglasses. AND a ton of food. We collected the bounty of gifts and cards by the fireplace inside and I was thinking it would make sense to open them after since there was such a large group. Well, what was I thinking!

"Please, please, please PLEASE mom? Please can I open my gifts?" Now that in itself was nearly the hook, but i was sunk when he was backed up by 10 other anxious teens wanting to see what he got. OKAY! So about 40+ people crowded in the living room, the teens crammed in the center like Christmas morning. That was truly the best moment for me. Seeing the kids tear into bags and packages and cards exclaiming with excitement at each thing, passing it all around. Magnetic! I glanced around the room and everyone was just smiling. I don't think any of us old people knew what to expect but it was priceless. I will probably still be smiling 30 years from now. Ha. He got everything he loves, balloons, candy, silly costumes, masks, crafts, photo books, video games, gaming systems, clothes, gift cards and money. And he got a visit from his most wonderful GIRL-FRIEND Tanya!!!! He was ear to ear smiles.....more than usual. Yes I am gushing a bit but it is an overwhelming thing to see that God has indeed shown such favor on our son.

Well the night ended before 10 p.m., cleaned up and put entirely away before everyone left. Linda, Charlotte, Nicole, Collin, and honestly I am not sure who else.....but THANK YOU for all the help cleaning up. I am still emotional when I think about this great day. You see as the mother of a special needs child you dream. You dream that they will be able to read, write a little, socialize with others, have friends, go to a dance, learn to take care of themselves, graduate..........My dreams have come true. I am amazed at the human Cody has become. I am grateful for the many friends who have embraced him and helped him arrive!

PART 1: Like Sands thru the Hourglass........

...................these are the days of our lives!

The whirlwind of celebrations and change is unmatched. Our one and only wonderful son (Yes, I am ridiculously biased) went to senior prom, graduated with robust enthusiasm and had a party that was so organic it would be impossible to recreate. So now is where I will begin the entire story. Those of you who are interested get your coffee, tissue and sigh deeply at all the appropriate spots. Those of you who aren't sure, well, you should endure to be polite. And so if I ask you what you thought you wont have to try to fake it.

So a senior that has blossomed into a man, his words not mine. He will always be my baby, to which he says "Don't be silly mom, I'm a man!" Here it is.......

School - It is an incredible program. Not that I expected it to be or believed it would be. I was NOT happy about high school, large schools, buses, 2000 students. Not safe, Not safe Not safe! I was THAT mother, parked across the street for hours, binoculars on, Excedrin and coffee in the car to keep me sharp, awake, READY should my assistance or super hero mom rescue skills be needed. I am, afterall, only one degree away from a Power Ranger. LOL The many elements to this community vision have been promoted, fought for and set into place over the course of years. Campaigns for acceptance, Spread the Word to End the Word, Cougar Camp and so much more are evident throughout the school year. Cody was able to be a part of one of those events in his sophomore year.

Cody Gates reads Its Okay to be Different

And it was perfection for the students this year. The principals, teachers, support staff and student body have emulated a very accepting culture that does not tolerate cruelty, bullying, discrimination. Students care for each other, protect each other, high five and knuckle pump as they pass in the hall. In the course of the four years they have achieved a solid Best Buddy Program, Unified Sports Program and recognition for sports so the athletes can earn the school Letter. Dr. Tim Shriver even paid a visit. So much energy. The Adaptive dance kids were even included in the homecoming festivities dancing at halftime.



Track - I have always said that he is not prone to movement. And that he is the definition of Terra fer ma. So the race is set to begin, the gun fires (yes a loud gun with folks who have sensory issues) and they are off. Well, they start! And it is at the 20 meter mark that the competition enters his peripheral vision. I am thinking to myself, blinders could help, but no! He stops dead in stride. He is done. if he cant be first (in FRONT) he wont 'BE'! Over the next 30 meters or so two coaches, three peer buddies and an assortment of team mates attempted to coax him forward. It took an enormous red bird, yes THE RED Bird from AZ Cardinals to get him moving. He took his hand and ran not only across the finish line but continued on for another 200 meters. Hmmm Well, he had fun, right? And he did it HIS way, as he did the standing long jump. Yes, standing.......or running hopping jump. Run from the start line, into the sand until you get to the spot you like then 'hop' to stick your landing....and throw yourself forward to imply effort. LOL It is all about having fun right?!

Arizona Athletes to Compete in 2014 Special Olympics

Cheer - He has always loved strings, pom poms, streamers. So when he said he was doing cheer I honestly was hoping that he was not going to come home with pom poms or a skirt or a hair bow. I know, I could not envision a 'manly cheer'. It is actually a natural talent for this kid. He is the essence of joy, kindness, compassion, enthusiasm and encouragement. It sounds over the top, but his gift is building others whether in word or deed. He will lift you up, remember your name, give you a hug. He values others as friends for life. I was amazed and PROUD. He not only looked fantastic, but was wonderful! He GETS cheer, it is similar to dance which he loves and he did awesome. It was VERY manly indeed. They won Gold and Silver. I wanted to go straight to a game just to hear him do more. MAYBE I can get him on the squad for Cardinals or Coyotes or United. LOL!



Prom - OK, get the tissue out! Ashley had a plan in place and with the assistance of the Unified class, they set out to help Cody solve the mystery! He played games to win clues, then with everyone watching his beautiful date asked him to the prom. So exciting. It was MY dream come true. When you have a special needs child, or even a typical child who just doesn't quite fit the mold of 'in' to see them embraced by a large group of peers is such an amazing experience. The video of the challenge and her popping the question was put together and set to music. The local news picked it up and then the national media ran a story. ROCK STARS! I played chauffeur taking Cody to pick up his date, go to a photo shoot with some of the other students, put to special dinner then to the dance. I was sent away! No need to come back "I got this" she assured me. She did! One of the chaperone's sent footage of him 'dancing the night away'! I picked them up at midnight and took them home. He looked at me after and said "that is the best night I ever had mom!" I felt exactly the same!!!!

Ashley asks Cody to Prom

Project Unify at Kellis High School Shines

Student with Disabilities gets Awesome Prom Proposal


Prom 2 - YES, TWO proms. The City of Peoria Adaptive rec had a prom the following weekend. His date took him to that one too. It was of course much smaller, quieter, but the kids there had all grown up together for the most part. It was when we had them all up on the stage getting pictures in the balloons it hit me. He is grown up! Oh I know I should have figured it out from all the man hair but it was seeing him with this group of grown children (fine, adults) that I sobbed. And I do mean, needed tissue, boo hoo, I am so proud/sad/old kind of cry. It was a great night once we got back to dancing and of course this time I got to be there too!

Awards - Both before and right after graduation there were awards and recognition for accomplishments. He put on his suit and tie which of course forced me to learn (find the picture guide online) to tie a tie. Without a smart phone it would have been a clip on, that is all I have to say. He even helped emcee the Unified Sports Athlete awards. It lasted about 100 hours but it was great for these kids to get to celebrate themselves and their peers. At the end we were able to hear some of the students share what this program has meant to them, how it will impact them. Very encouraging to see the impact of these relationships is definitely bilateral. And I would say it is triangular when you throw the parents in.....hmmmmm and siblings, and teachers. Wow, it may be a trapezoid but we would need to check with Mr. E. Anyway, MANY people are reached through this program, compelled to change their ways and become to the lost the friend in need, the buddy at the game or movie, or even the friend who just hangs out.





Graduation - GRADUATION! He DID it! We sat on the main deck in a box area to accommodate wheelchairs, canes and ease. We had a great view, just not close up. Many of his lifelong friends and classmates were graduating too. Alex, Maybeth, Xena, Kevin, Andrew, Kevin, Lucia, Sarah and so many more. From peanuts to people there they were all dressed in blue or gold, tassels on, proper and anxiously waiting their turn to cross that stage. And we could not hear quite as much as we were able to in the video. You see there must have been a good close mic on the stage. So when names were called you could hear STUDENT responses. So in the tape those mics were hot. So when graduation was happening, I was crying, cheering, you know, the usual but when we were able to listen and watch the tape, and hear his excitement, and see him close up, I was crying and cheering even more!

Raymond S Kellis Graduation 2014

A Wonderful Prom Proposal

A Wonderful Prom Proposal

Right This Minute heard about amazing Ashley, Kellis High School and one thrilled young man!

Amazing!

I use this word constantly as of late, and it began to raise concerns by some who feel my world view is amiss. "Life can not always be good!", "Amazing people or events are not common!" Or even "Still medicated are you?" Well let me share some "amazing" with you!




Ashley- a beautiful 17 year old who has spent months planning the "date proposal". She coordinated games, people, teachers and a huge banner all to ask Cody to senior prom. Photos and a video while wonderful can not really demonstrate the delight of a thrilled young man. He still blushes as he recounts the events, his voice jumping a few octaves.

Andrew - This gentle spirit can laugh with Cody and talk Him through anything. Cody has mastered a 45 step hand greeting, overcome a basketball meltdown resulting in a couple dozen great shots and run an entire football field at least once scoring a touch down to boot. All this because Andrew is there and Andrew is "my best friend"!

Allyson - This beautiful girl we have watched bloom for years. You know crying, diapers, giggles, since the beginning! Quiet, observent, full of compassion. And talent! She is the observer at our gatherings, seeing what we miss because we are too busy. She invested her gifts and time to create a memory that will last a lifetime. She sketched a pencil drawing of Cody, which he immediately recognized himself feeling the celebrity that he is. Things were moved and it was given the wall of honor.

Tanya- Dance is a favorite along with singing. We encourage dance for many reasons. In more than two years of ballet one constant has been his friend Tanya. She is a lovely, patient, devoted friend. She will come and just hang out hoping to get some good Wii in but enduring countless hours of Barney and the Wiggles. HOURS and yet remains a true companion.

Teachers- It is difficult to put a single name as they all have dedicated time, energy, patience, encouragement, long suffering and hope in the life of our son. They 'get' him, what makes him work, what shuts him down. They call just to make sure something is ok, they text pictures so we don't miss anything. They get US! They recognize we entrust them with our son and want us to enjoy the ride. It is not common, it does not happen everyday. They have had big dreams for Cody, helped us see new adventures. They have not called the police even when I parked outside watching the campus until I adjusted to high 'freakin big' school. They have laughed and cried with us. They have been and always will be our friends.

Melinda - She says she has learned so much from Cody. But she has taught us so much. She sees Cody's gifts, his love of helping, caring for others, exceptional manners. We see her ginormous hug, her smiles and comfort in just being with Cody. She has never been afraid to dance even in the theater right in front of the audience. She lets him enjoy being!

Caroline - She sees the inner dancer in everyone. Her entire mission to boldly dance where others never consider. Never say Never! Who says limitations or ability keeps someone from dancing. Let it never be! She has embraced his creative nature and has encouraged confidence, freedom and constantly redefining what 'normal' and 'ballet' really are.

Diana - Calm, quiet, friend. She is a constant presence in his life and is skilled at keeping him calm, moving forward, willing to step in when head butting is in force. She talks to him as the grown up he is and keeps the bar high for expectations.





These are only a few of the many Amazing stories. I will tell more I am sure but perhaps this is a glimpse of the word Amazing for me!