Love One Another

As we approach the annual celebration of Valentines day we are reminded to declare our love, commitment and thankfulness to those special individuals in our lives. We are saturated with things that are red and heart shaped and chocolate. It is a very commercial day, but at the same time it is a wake up call for many who take for granted those who love and support them throughout the year.

As I was headed out to the grocery store tonight I saw the most heart warming site. An elderly man with an unsteady gait was walking slowly home from the store with a bouquet of flowers in his hand. It was dark and cool, but his determination was evident. What a lovely sign of love and commitment.

It is much like what I observe with my old people. One always looking out for the other. At times they seem like Marie and Frank Romano, but at others they are like the Cleavers. It is in those moments that I realize their long standing devotion, which clearly out weighs the momentary aggravations of the day. Helping each other order food, sharing pie, choosing a restaurant they never want to go to because it means so much to the other.

How many opportunities do we miss each day to encourage someone with love, offer a good word or blessing or to touch their heart with genuine love? I am thinking the number is high. We are selfish and self absorbed in many ways. We may not recognize it, but we focus only on the things that matter to us, but not what impact we may have on those we share global space with, family or strangers!

It is the example seen at the store; people smiling at their shopping companions but glaring at the clerk, impatient with fellow shoppers or leaving a dropped product for store help to pick up. Those wonderful folks provide a great service to us and often with a smile and kindness. How often do we offer genuine gratitude, ask them about their day or offer them holiday good will.

Love one another (John 13:34) good times and bad, tired or jiggy, feel like it or not. Your simple action may open the wellspring of joy for many, pressed down and shaken! It is with love and gratitude I send this today. You are loved!

Bump on the Head

Well here it is:

Once upon a time there was a woman who was standing
And she stood and she stood and she stood.
Then one day she started a whirling and twirling
landing feet pointed skyward, her head kissing wood.
A knot could be found on her head, big and hard
And at the big hospital they just wanted her medical card.
After tests, rests, pests and an ambulance cruise
she found she had suffered simply a great big bruise.
So home she did go with her eye swollen shut
where she is waiting for less swelling
before she leaves her small hut.

You never know what each day will bring. Sitting to write a simple thank you card can land you in the hospital. Who knew. I think about that often. When wee wake up each day we really never say, "Today I will land on my can and fracture a hip" yet...given enough time we can accomplish this and much more.

The point is that we should not take our healthy time for granted. It is the time to prepare for those moments when we are less graceful or less able to do those simple things like walk, exercise, sweep, wash dishes,etc. You get the idea. You think it is not me, won't happen to me, I am so in charge.

You are so not and the reality is, it could be you NOW, while minding your own 'biz! As you are sitting and reading this small passing thought, you could fall off your stool and get a big knot. So what will you do to prepare for that fall, it will happen to you in no time at all. The result you may find from a good bump to the head, is you can't remember the things you have read. So tape to the wall the goals for each day, like standing and sitting in the safest of ways:)


Jude 24-25

distraction

Whether it is a joyful event or a concerning one, distraction can be found. As a matter of fact it can find me in the middle of doing the dishes. One minute you are organized and have a game plan for the day, the next you are coloring with your son while watching a Frasier rerun. That's right, I color, and I am good too!

It seems this past year has been full of distractions. Change in work status, change in health status, child events, parent events, neighbor events. Even in the community, distractions. A favorite clerk at our local grocer died very suddenly before Christmas. Distraction. My son had to endure an extensive dental procedure ... twice. Distraction. My mother landed in the hospital. Distraction. I have a new job. Distraction.

Good or bad, it changes the delicate balance which is me and I become distracted. I was so surprised and grateful when I finally accepted my job loss (not necessarily when it occurred just when I acknowledged it was so!)as I was suddenly putting in order many things that had fallen way down the list. Much of it due to the daily distractions of a married mother, employee, student, caregiver. And the whole age thing, well, I am willing to admit it may be a factor.

What that moment of order provided was an opportunity for me to evaluate some very important voids. I had not been as well acquainted with some relatives as I desired. I made some contact. What WONDERFUL people. Acquainted. I was not good at keeping up with some dear friends. Reconnected. I enjoyed finding a little order.

Now that I am working I feel a little distraction sneaking in. So in order to prevent a complete collapse of order I am planning regular time to continue some of my new found fun; writing, mailing, visiting, creating, cleaning (trust me, it is necessary), planning. I am hopeful that I can maintain this joy. But feel free to let me know if you see me slipping or becoming..............distracted.

Common Ground

It is often a strange thing how life takes you down one path then curves you around. You have your family, interest, activities, you may seem self absorbed at times. Then some event will occur or a communication line is open and you suddenly have people in your life that previously were just names or holiday acquaintances. You find that time has brought you around to a place of common ground.

Years ago, many years ago, I was fortunate to have a few visits to the deep south to visit cousins. We enjoyed each other, had fun and wrote letters for a few years after our last visit. Then life happened. College, marriage, moves, work, family changes. Time continued on but our connection was lost. Perhaps in the timing of life we lost our common ground. Perhaps we were distracted. Whatever it was, there was a gap.

I remember getting this article from my cousin. She was so excited. And years later I bet she has long forgotten this and the letter it came with. But years later we are on the same page again. Growing children, aging parents, middle age siblings. We are on common ground again. What is really special is the ability to pick up where we left off. We chat a few minutes and essentially have filled in the gaps. We discover in some way or another we have been doing the same things.

I have cousins, aunts and uncles that are just the same. Years where we are living everyday life with minimal communication not because we didn't care but because we were taking care of the home front. Now a quieter or at least more controlled time has risen giving us the chance to re-connect. When we talk it all out, we find we are standing on common ground. So for this moment I can enjoy the love of family and celebrate the chance to know family better, to share in their joy and their trials.

Adventures

Wouldn't it be fun to get into the car and just drive to the center of somewhere and see something? In the good old days there were fewer somewheres to see, but by gollie, everyone saw what ever it was. You drove to one of those big stars on the map, stopped your car and said "Yep, there it is. What is it?" No matter what the answer was you could at least say you had been somewhere and seen something.

Today so few people take the open road. The take the silver sausage over the clouds where the only thing you see is clouds, the hair follicles of the passenger in front of you and the stain on the fabric on the seat back in front of you. And let us not even talk about the smell, or the noise, or the cramped quarters. Good times!

We would hop into our ginormous Mercury with room for 100 in the backseat, drive cross the country and look at the land. We have seen a lot of land too. But there was fresh air, Stuckeys pecan rolls and the Pennsylvania Dutch pancake houses. On the plane all you get is,...no wait, you don't "get" anything now. But you can bu a fast food meal for 3X's it ground based cost. Yum!

It is true you can get places faster, BUT, you can not get there without a cramp in your leg and a cold. And now the prices are up as well as your luggage is now considered a passenger. Give it a name and they will charge it for that happy meal:)

So what do we need to consider when taking some great adventure: is there really a rush? Can you take one extra travel day to take the trip on land and see some of the wonder that is America? Can you take a road less traveled and see things that, well, are unique, like the worlds deepest hand dug well in Greensburg KS or Dorothy's home in.....do you know? Hmmmm time to get out that map and start a road adventure of your own.

Look for things like the geographic center of the contigous United States or the geographic center of North America. Plan from there, then you can say we went somewhere and saw something. When others ask you will know the answer and have a trinket or photo to revive a memory of License Plate BINGO or other lame but entertaining travel games. Oh, and leave those nasty tv's and headphones at home. Make it a real family adventure, you know, everyone taking the same trip.

Enjoy the road less traveled!!

Closing the Gap

Well the holidays are here and gone, so where is my family? Hmm? Did anyone think all those years ago when we were in our footie pajamas that a day would come when we would not get to wake up, be blinded by the camera lights and not have moms turkey dinner (it is really all about the gravy :) ). The world has gotten smaller in a technological way so we can now text, email, skype, conference call and more. You name it we can at least touch base so that is wonderful. But no hugs, that is the tough part.

I spent this year pulling out at least one picture of a "memorable" moment so as I talked to or at someone I had that image in my sight. When we think about the measure of life it is clear that while the number of days or years seem large, the time is always too short. So enjoying good times together or at least the memories we can perhaps be mindful of are the greatest gifts we have been given over the years.

I watched the people running wild this year, stressing out about shopping, gifts, impressing others, fancy parties, appearances, etc. While those things are fine, they should not be the focus, yet many miss the point of the holiday and the family gatherings all together. And now that it is over, we put the tree away (yes away, it is stored in a box) and resume the daily activities for another 341 days. And just like this year it will be here before you know it. And most of you won't even remember what you got or who sent you a lovely card.

So instead of waiting for a special day, just call someone, send a note, text them, let them know that even though there is no turkey or big fancy tree, they are wonderful to you. Even if they drive you crazy, don't let the year pass by. Step outside your comfort zone and send a February 9th letter just because you care. Or a May 16 card just to say hi! And if you need decorations, a tree and a turkey to get in the mood then by gollie, leave your tree up and your Butterball in the oven. But whatever you do, reach out and close the gap.

The UNITED States

Football. A national past time, or obsession. No matter where you live or what you know about the sport, you will attach to a team. Maybe it is the cute mascot, or the color of the uniform, or because they are from the same part of the country or because it is the team others are cheering against. Whatever the reason, we adopt them as personal friends and the end results of their performance gives meaning to our lives or at least to our football parties.

So what is it anyway, that draws a country together to watch grown men run around in tights and throw a lemon shaped leather ball around a grass field, with stripes? It could be the amazement of watching the physical and mental ability displayed by these guys who work hours everyday to perfect their craft. It could be, but I think, not so much. More likely it is because in some way they are able to do what we used to do, what we would like to do, or what we would like to do to others! Admit it, a good tackle wound be so much fun!

I love that a simple thing like sports can eliminate the barriers between people. Sure we may cheer for opposing teams, but, we will cheer. It reminds of the Shirley Temple films back in the depression. It took the minds of a troubled country off war or financial hardship. Everyone wanted to tap dance and sing a little ditty. With sports we can forget for a moment troubled times in our lives, our country or our world. And we get to have some fun in the process.

So now is the season for the country to unite and cheer with one loud voice "GO......?" You can fill in the blank, and perhaps we will meet in the Super Bowl for a final yell fest before we get back to the routine of life.

"As cute as she looks she is a piece of work", a saying that applies to my son today. Hmmm. I had to do it by myself, whatever it was. Parents help? No way. Siblings help? Double no way. Dog help? Sure why not. The dog could be trusted, not so for the humans or so I would believe. And sometimes it was absolutely true. You know, the sibling who tickle you until you were purple or wet or other some such. Or who chases you around until you run into the wall and cut your head open. True! I have evidence. So it would be until I as older, I won't say how much older. I would find my own way, do my own thing.

Not all bad. I have been around the world and done a great many things that others only dream of. I have met so many fascinating people, many who are still friends today. And I have done some things that were less desirable as a result of my independent way. For me, often, learning comes by doing. A few 100,000 criminals have the same story. Fortunately I was not lost for ever. Salvation came and I was given a chance to do it over. Not everyone gets that chance. It has been even better!

So that cute little kid who broke everything she owns (I am talking bones not possessions) and was attacked by her science project has had her eyes opened a bit over the years and sees things a lot different then say, when I was 19. Whole other world and purpose. That was the world without borders or rules. Anything went. It was really not so much rebellion or apathy, but searching. Longing for a life satisfying experience to be the best high ever. As reckless as I was I never found it in all the adventure. Just a short "buzz".

It was when I found out why I was here, what my purpose was, who I could trust that I found I could find real contentment no matter where I was or what I was doing. No longer seeking to find something but suddenly interested in giving something, doing something that mattered for someone else. It has been life altering. I have a long lasting peace and joy that is there no matter what is going on around me. It is better than anything I felt before. And it didn't cost me a thing, I didn't have to fly around the world to find it. It is here all the time, 24/7. Isn't that great? So when you are tired of the roller coaster of life, check out the journey of a lifetime.

"You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy;
at your right hand are pleasures forevermore."Psalm 16:11
Mark 8:36 Romans 10:13 2 Corinthians 5:17 Jeremiah 29:11

A New Year Dawning

As I reflect on this year I think of many awesome and awful things almost simultaneously. It is a great thing that a blend of events occurred in order to prevent complete collapse due to stress or complacency for the lack of it. It is an interesting thing, the life cycle. It seems true that it sails by at light speed. But oh what a great ride.
In another day the pace was slower, the entertainment was socializing and the culture was family or home based. People rarely moved around the globe or spent their days and nights away from loved ones. Now you are challenged to find them in the same state let alone the same house!
Pace, it is all about the pace. We are always in a hurry and thus the time must keep our pace. It flies by often before you can develop your photos or hang last years high school picture up. You are shipping your Christmas parcels overnight express mail despite the fact that you knew Christmas was coming 365 days ago! In the last century you spent half of the year just MAKING the gifts, and then had to plan for 3 weeks for the horse or carriage delivery.
As I look at this picture of my family from the early 1800's I think how long did they spend getting cleaned up, traveling and posing for the photo. Hours? Days? Today we want that WalMart discount shot and we want it right now! Our last family shoot took about 15 minutes max. And there were complaints of being hot, crowded, uncomfortable. Really, are you looking at those clothes? There was no air conditioning, there was no indoor plumbing, there as no cold refreshment stand. Hmmm
So what would it take for you to relax, reorganize, maybe re-prioritize your time. In our fast paced society I am suddenly in favor of planners that allow you to block out or plan time for whatever. Photos, zoo, shopping, coffee, meals, trips, whatever!
So in this New Year it might be a good opportunity, or your last opportunity to spend some quality time with those that really mean the most. Don't waste a minute. Don't let the year zoom by without a single change. Plan now and enjoy this New Year dawning.

A Split Second

This past 10 days has been one of rejoicing and remembering. I have watched friends and family celebrate the joy of restored life that was once on the brink of death, and a family preparing for the passing of a life most loved. We are constantly reminded that we are not in control. It is the circle of life for all mankind. And these circumstances should drive us to the only one who is in complete control. But do they always?

In the trenches it is hard to find an atheist, or so they say. And when we are unprepared for life altering events, we often cry out to "God" even if we have never done that before or we are not sure who or what He is. But once the fear and urgency subside, so do the calls for an answer. A child should never suffer or die early, and we are always challenged to accept and understand those situations. When the child recovers despite the predictions of the physicians we often attribute that to people, but the truth is only God has that authority and power.

When our loved ones are faced with death, that is when we plead for reassurance or realize we are unprepared for what comes next. We perhaps have lived in a way that is apathetic or careless, not thinking about the end but only the moment. It causes great anxiety when the time arrives especially if we do not know for sure what the outcome will be. We may even become angry or utterly depressed. We have not paid attention to the message all of our life and now can not recall it. Yet it is the same today as when we first heard it.

The Christmas story really is the complete answer, as we see God becoming man for the soul purpose of dying so that anyone can live! Wow. In a split second we can choose to accept the offer of eternal life, a split second! That is how long it took a car to rear-end and total my van in June. That is how long it took a stroke to threaten the life of an eleven year old. That is how long it took for the last breath to leave a dear friend. Do you feel that in a split second you will have time to "think" about this offer? No, not really.

So my challenge today, take a second and make a decision that will give you eternal peace. No more fears about the unknown. No more anxiety or anger about the circle of life. A split second for all of eternity. Wow.

John 3:17

Until Death

I have a bath towel that has a great quote: "It may be true that married men live longer but they are much more willing to die." I love it and I am sure it is true. Ha. My husband has always been patient and very forgiving. But I have placed even greater challenge on him this year as my memory has been a bit ...... um.....absent at times since a summer car accident. Leave it to the unexpected events in life to change a course. We wake up and feel we know what the day will hold and Boom, surprise, you are completely wrong!

Doesn't mean the change is bad, but it can certainly force you to evaluate many things when these life events occur. What is important? What really needs to be done? What can be let go of, etc? Will world peace be prevented? Will Oprah cancel your featured episode? Really....

I have historically been very busy and very organized. Now not so much, matter of fact it is midnight, I have dirty dishes in the sink and a load of clothes that will need to meet the dryer in the morning. And I need to vacuum but that will need to wait too. Will anyone die if these things aren't done? No way. I spent the evening watching football with my husband and painting with my son. Then i tackled a poster for a friend. These are the things that will have value for the family and friends, not that my baseboards were washed (though I would be really grateful if anyone would want to help with any of these things:)).

I look at couples who have been married for many years and when asked what kept them together it was never once mentioned that it was because the dishes were in the cupboard or the laundry was done or the windows were washed. It was more for things like friendship, support, faithfulness, forgiveness, humor, patience and of course love. Those are things I want in my husbands citation should he be asked. And we are friends, which is great because when the world rises up against us or the lawn overtakes the house, we still have each other.

Proverbs 17